Month: January 2020

As explained in my blog for morning prayer, the Catholic Church has no common prayers in the Liturgy of the Hours for married couples (deceased or living). What I am posting here is an Evening Prayer I have put together to be prayed in memory of a married couple who are deceased, or for, or by a living married couple on their wedding anniversary. Most of the language can apply to either. There are two final prayers one for a couple who are deceased and one for a couple who are living. The scripture readings, psalms, and canticles have been taken from The Inclusive Bible, and prayers and adaptations of prayers have been taken from the Liturgy of the Hours done by the International Committee on English in the Liturgy. Copyrights are found at the conclusion of the prayer.

EVENING PRAYER ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF A MARRIED COUPLE

INTRODUCTORY VERSE
O Adonai, come to my assistance.Lord, make haste to help me.Glory toGod our Abba, to Jesus the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: as it was in the beginning is now and will be for ever. Amen.

HYMN:

We have been told.
We’ve seen his face
and heard his voice alive in our hearts.
“Live in my love with all your heart.
As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you.

1. I am the vine; you are the branches,
and all who live in me will bear great fruit.

2. You are my friends, if you keep my commands,
no longer slaves; I call you friends.

3. No greater love is there than this: to lay down one’s life for a friend.

David Haas © 1983, GIA Publications, Inc.

PSALMODY*

Antiphon 1: God loves us and provides for us.

PSALM 127

If Yahweh doesn’t build the house,
the builders work in vain;
if Yahweh doesn’t guard the city,
the sentries watch in vain.

In vain you get up early and stay up late,
sweating to make a living,
because God loves us and provides for us
even while we sleep.

Children are the heritage God gives us;
our descendants are our rewards.
Having children when you are young
is like equipping an archer
with wonderful new arrows.

Happy are those who have filled their quiver
with such arrows!
When they argue with their enemies at the city gate,
no one will be able to make them feel ashamed.

Glory to …

Antiphon 1: God loves us and provides for us.

Silent prayer

Antiphon 2: Blest are those who go to the House of the Lord!

Psalm 122

How I rejoiced when they said to me,
“Let us go to the house of Yahweh!”
And now our feet are standing
within your gates, Jerusalem.

Jerusalem restored!
The city, one united whole!
Here the tribes ascend,
the tribes of Yahweh.

They come to praise Yahweh’s Name,
as God commanded Israel—
Here, where the tribunals of justice are,
the judgment seats of David’s house.

Pray for peace within Jerusalem:
“May those who love you prosper!
May peace be in your walls!
May your citadels be always secure!”

For the sake of my family and friends,
I say, “Peace be within you!”
For the sake of Yahweh our God,
I will seek your good.

Glory to …

Antiphon 2: Blest are those who go to the House of the Lord!

Silent prayer

Antiphon 3: Let us clothe ourselves in God’scompassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

CANTICLE – Colossians. 3:12-17

Because you are God’s chosen ones,
holy and beloved,
clothe yourselves with heartfelt compassion,
with kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Bear with one another;
forgive whatever grievances
you have against one another—
forgive in the same way God has forgiven you.

Above all else, put on love,
which binds the rest together
and makes them perfect.
Let Christ’s peace reign in your hearts since,
as members of one body,
you have been called to that peace.

Dedicate yourselves to thankfulness.
Let the Word of Christ, rich as it is, dwell in you.
Instruct and admonish one another wisely.
Sing gratefully to God from your hearts
in psalms, hymns and songs of the Spirit.

And whatever you do,
whether in speech or in action,
do it in the name of Jesus our Savior,
giving thanks to God through Christ.

Glory to …

Antiphon 3: Let us clothe ourselves in God’scompassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

Silent prayer

READING: 1 Corinthians 12:31-13:8a

Strive eagerly for the greatest spiritual gifts. But I shall show you a still more excellent way. If I speak in human and angelic tonguesbut do not have love, I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal.And if I have the gift of prophecy and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing.If I give away everything I own, and if I hand my body over so that I may boast but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated,it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury,it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

RESPONSORY

All holy couples are led into presence of God amid gladness and joy.
All holy couples are led into presence of God amid gladness and joy.

They are led into the presence of God,
Amid gladness and joy.

Glory to God our Abba, to Jesus the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
All holy couples are led into presence of God amid gladness and joy.

CANTICLE OF MARY

Antiphon: We praise your holy name, my God, those who hearts seek you will rejoice (alleluia).

My soul proclaims your greatness, my Lord,
and my spirit rejoices in you my Saviour;
because you have looked upon the humiliation of me, your servant.
Yes, from now onwards all generations will call me blessed,
You, the Almighty, have done great things for me.
Holy is Your name,
Your faithful love extends age after age to those who fear You.
You have used the power of Your arm,
You have routed the arrogant of heart.
You have pulled down princes from their thrones
and raised high the lowly.
You have  filled the starving with good things,
sent the rich away empty.
You have come to the help of Israel the servant of God,
 mindful of God’s faithful love,
according to the promise God made to our ancestors,
of Your mercy to Abraham and to his descendants for ever.

Glory to …

Antiphon: We praise your holy name, my God, those who hearts seek you will rejoice (alleluia).

INTERCESSIONS

We experience the Lord’s presence in the exchange of a couple’s vows in marriage, we ask you, O Lord, to listen to us, and to bless our words of prayer which we offer for the people

of the world as we say; may we experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who, every day renewed their desire to grow in love for each other, may they experience the fullness of  your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who turned to Christ in all their joys and sorrows and helped each other throughout life to discover their personal gifts and used them to serve you, Lord, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who received the abundant gifts of the Holy Spirit to make their marriage an ever-more powerful sigh of Christ’s love for the world, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For all married couples, may they renew their commitment to love and to share with the world the mystery of God’s friendship and love, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For all God’s holy people, may they grow in their desire to serve those in need and love in our world, O Lord.

For our World, in its hunger for love may it turn to Christ and acknowledge him as Lord, may our World experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For our relatives and friends, all who walk with us on life’s journey, and for those who have gone before us to the other side of Life, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord. 

THE PRAYER OF JESUS

Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come,
Your will be done on earth
as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass
against us, and lead us not into
temptation but deliver us from evil,
for the Kingdom, the power,
and the glory, is Yours,
now and forever. Amen.

CONCLUDING PRAYER

(for deceased couple)

God,
source of all happiness and love,
You created man and woman in your own likeness.
We humbly pray to you for N. and N.
they both praised you when they were happy
and turned to you in their sorrows.
May they rejoiced that you help them in their work
and knew that you are with them in their need.
They prayed to you in the community of the Church,
and gave witness to you in the world.
as they came together to your table on earth,
so may they have the joy of sharing your feast in heaven. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Amen.

(for living couples)

God,
source of all happiness and love,
You created man and woman in your own likeness.
We humbly pray to you for N. and N.
We (they) praise you when we (they) are happy
and turn to you in our (their) sorrows.
We (they) rejoice that you help us (them) in our (their) work and know that you are with us (them) in our need. We (they) pray to you in the community of the Church, and give witness to you in the world.
As we (they) come together to your table on earth,
so may we (they) have the joy of sharing your feast in heaven. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Amen.

DISMISSAL

May God bless us, protect us from all evil
and bring us into everlasting life.
Amen.

*Psalms, Canticles and Scripture passages from  The Inclusive Bible: The First Egalitarian Bible (2007) by Priests for Equality, Published by  Sheed & Ward.

Other prayers and adaptations from the English Translation of the Liturgy of the Hours and the Roman Missal (former) © 1970, 1973,1974,1975 by the International Committee On English In The Liturgy Inc. All rights reserved.

For those of us who pray the Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Hours, there is no such thing as the Common of Married Couples. There is the Common of Holy Women, The Common of Holy Men, The Common of Martyrs, The Common of the Apostles, The Common of Priests, The Common of Mary, but no Common for Married Couples. I think it is a glaring omission on the part of the Church to NOT acknowledge the vocation of married couples in its prayer life. Seemingly the Church loves to elevate the celibate life over married life, forgetting that if everyone was celibate there would be no celibate clergy or religious because the human race would have died out.

One thing I have learned in 42 years of church ministry is not to wait for the Church to act, but take it upon myself to act. So without any approval or disapproval upon the hierarchy of the Church, I have put together my own Common of Married Couples. Because marriage is an inclusive union, the readings, canticles, and psalms are taken from The Inclusive Bible, the prayers are adaptations of the prayers from the Liturgy of the Hours translated by the International Committee of English in the Liturgy. All copyright acknowledgements are listed at the end.

I have designed these prayers to be prayed on the wedding anniversaries of deceased loved ones or prayed on the anniversary of living married couples. All that is needed is to change language from the past tense to the present tense (in italics).

Here is Morning Prayer.

MORNING PRAYER ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF A MARRIED COUPLE

INTRODUCTORY VERSE
O Adonai, come to my assistance. Lord, make haste to help me. Glory to God our Abba, to Jesus the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: as it was in the beginning is now and will be for ever. Amen.

HYMN

I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine
I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine

seek the face of our God and long for God
God will bring you light and peace

I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine
I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine

seek the face of  our God and long for God
God will bring you joy and hope

I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine
I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you, and you are mine

© 1979 by Michael Joncas, Published by Oregon Catholic Press. All rights reserved.

PSALMODY*

Antiphon 1: Happiness comes to those who revere God.

Psalm 128

Happiness comes to those who revere Yahweh,
and walk in God’s ways!
You will eat what your hands have worked for;
you will be blessed and prosperous.

You will be a fruitful vine
in the heart of your house;
your children will grow up around your table,
spring up like olive trees.

This is how you will be blessed
if you revere Yahweh.
May Yahweh bless you from Zion,
and may you see the prosperity of Jerusalem
all the days of your life!

May you live to see your children’s children!
Peace be on Israel!

Glory to …

Antiphon 1: Happiness comes to those who revere God.

Silent prayer

Antiphon 2: Happy those in whom God’s love dwells.

Canticle – Song of Songs 2: 8-17

Here comes my lover,
running down the mountains like a gazelle,
leaping the hills like a stag
in search of his doe.

Look at him, standing out there
staring in through the window lattices
like the moon.

He is calling me: “come, sweetheart,
my pretty one, come out!
Winter is over, the rains are gone,
The flowers are blooming.

it’s time for singing;
let’s walk out through the valleys
and listen to the song of the dove.
The fig trees are setting fruit;
and the air is full of the smell of grape blossoms.

Arise and come, my pretty darling.
come away with me!”

Glory to …

Antiphon 2: Happy those in whom God’s love dwells.

Silent prayer

Antiphon 3: Acclaim God with joy, all the earth!

Psalm 100

Acclaim Yahweh with joy,
all the earth!
Serve Yahweh with gladness!
Enter into God’s presence with a joyful song!

Know that Yahweh is God!
Yahweh made us, and we belong to the Creator;
we are God’s people
and the sheep of God’s pasture.

Enter God’s gates with thanksgiving
and the courts with praise!
Give thanks to God!

Bless God’s Name!
For Yahweh is good;
God’s steadfast love endures forever,
and God’s faithfulness
to all generations.

Glory to …

Antiphon 3: Acclaim God with joy, all the earth!

Silent prayer

READING: RUTH 1:17

Where you go, I will go; where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people will be my people, and your God, my God. Where you die, I’ll die there too and I will be buried there beside you. I swear—may Yahweh be my witness and judge—that not even death will keep us apart.”

RESPONSORY

O God, we rejoice in your presence.
O God, we rejoice in your presence.

We are filled with gladness,
In your presence.

Glory to God our Abba, to Jesus the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
O God, we rejoice in your presence.

CANTICLE OF ZECHARIAH

Antiphon:Whoever does the will of my Abba, says the Lord, is my brother, my sister, and my mother.

Blessed are You, Yahweh, the God of Israel,
for You have visited Your people,
You have set them free,
And You have established for us a saving power
in the House of Your servant David,
Just as You proclaimed,
by the mouth of Your holy prophets from ancient times,
that You would save us from our enemies
and from the hands of all those who hate us,
and show faithful love to our ancestors,
and so keep in mind Your holy covenant.
This was the oath You swore
to our father Abraham,
that You would grant us, free from fear,
to be delivered from the hands of our enemies,
to serve You in holiness and uprightness
in Your presence, all our days.
And you, little child,
you shall be called Prophet of the Most High,
for you will go before the Savior
to prepare a way for him,
to give his people knowledge of salvation
through the forgiveness of their sins,
because of the faithful love of our God
in which the rising Sun has come from on high to visit us,
to give light to those who live
in darkness and the shadow dark as death,
and to guide our feet
into the way of peace.

Glory to …

Antiphon:Whoever does the will of my Abba, says the Lord, is my brother, my sister, and my mother.

INTERCESSIONS

We experience the Lord’s presence in the exchange of a couple’s vows in marriage, we ask you, O Lord, to listen to us, and to bless our words of prayer which we offer for the people
of the world as we say; may we experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who, every day renewed their desire to grow in love for each other, may they experience the fullness of  your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who turned to Christ in all their joys and sorrows and helped each other throughout life to discover their personal gifts and used them to serve you, Lord, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For N and N, who received the abundant gifts of the Holy Spirit to make their marriage an ever-more powerful sign of Christ’s love for the world, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For all married couples, may they renew their commitment to love and to share with the world the mystery of God’s friendship and love, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For all God’s holy people, may they grow in their desire to serve those in need and love in our world.

For our World, in its hunger for love it may turn to Christ and acknowledge him as Lord, may our World experience the fullness of your love, O Lord.

For our relatives and friends, all who walk with us on life’s journey, and for those who have gone before us to the other side of Life, may they experience the fullness of your love, O Lord. 

THE PRAYER OF JESUS

Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come,
Your will be done on earth
as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass
against us, and lead us not into
temptation but deliver us from evil,
for the Kingdom, the power,
and the glory, is Yours,
now and forever. Amen.

CONCLUDING PRAYER

God,
source of all happiness and love,
You created man and woman in your own likeness.
We humbly pray to you for N. and N.
they both praised (praise) you when they were happy
and turned (turn) to you in their sorrows.
They rejoiced (rejoice) that you help them in their work
and knew (know) that you are with them in their need.
They prayed (pray) to you in the community of the Church,
and gave (give) witness to you in the world.
as they came (come) together to your table on earth,
so may they have the joy of sharing your feast in heaven.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Amen.

DISMISSAL

May God bless us, protect us from all evil
and bring us into everlasting life.
Amen.

*Psalms and Canticles from  The Inclusive Bible: The First Egalitarian Bible (2007) by Priests for Equality, Published by  Sheed & Ward.

Other prayers and adaptations from the English Translation of the Liturgy of the Hours and the Roman Missal (former) © 1970, 1973,1974,1975 by the International Committee On English In The Liturgy Inc. All rights reserved.

This song, composed for my grandchildren the Christmas of 2017, is a musical reflection on this passage from the prophet Isaiah.

The desert and the parched land will exult;
the steppe will rejoice and bloom.
They will bloom with abundant flowers,
and rejoice with joyful song.
The glory of Lebanon will be given to them,
the splendor of Carmel and Sharon;
they will see the glory of the LORD,
the splendor of our God.
Strengthen the hands that are feeble,
make firm the knees that are weak,
say to those whose hearts are frightened:
Be strong, fear not!
Here is your God,
he comes with vindication;
with divine recompense
he comes to save you.
Then will the eyes of the blind be opened,
the ears of the deaf be cleared;
then will the lame leap like a stag,
then the tongue of the mute will sing.
Those whom the LORD has ransomed will return
and enter Zion singing,
crowned with everlasting joy;
they will meet with joy and gladness,
sorrow and mourning will flee. (Isaiah 35: 1-6a, 10, NAB)

I fashioned this song after the dance form known as a Mazurka. The Mazurka is a joyful dance in 3/4 meter popularized by the Polish composer, Frederick Chopin. What is different about this Mazurka is that is in 5/4 meter.

We often use the word epiphany to describe an insight or an idea that seems to come out of nowhere. In scripture, an epiphany is an occasion when human beings encounter God. Sometimes it is in the form of dramatic meteorological events, the Hebrews being led by a pillar of fire in the sky. Sometimes less dramatic events, the small breeze in which the prophet Elijah encounters God. Today we find the magi encountering the reality of God in the most unlikely of places, namely, a fragile human infant laying in the feed trough of a barn.

On this feast we are reminded that we have been blessed with an Epiphany that others have been denied. Think of all the people who have been denied this Epiphany. Herod, the high priests of the temple, the many Pharisees, Pilate, and those who denied Jesus. We are among an honored group of people who have encountered the presence of God in the person of Jesus Christ.

One author I continue to go back to time and time again is the Jewish Rabbi and theologian Martin Buber. Buber writes in his masterpiece, “I And Thou”, about encountering Epiphanies in our lives. Remember, an Epiphany is a sacred encounter with God. Buber speaks of encounter these Epiphanies in three different places, he calls thresholds.

The first threshold is encountering God in nature. How many times have we been aware of God’s sacred presence looking at the sea, the mountains, the beauty of forests, and so many other majestic places that leave us with a feeling of awe and glory.

The second threshold is encountering God in out interpersonal relationships. Buber speaks of these relationships as windows in which we look upon the face of the “Divine Thou.” I think of my relationship with my wife, Ruth, who is for me, the greatest living expression of God. As I have said time and time again, in her arms I feel God’s embrace. From her lips I hear God say to me, “I love you.” and “I forgive you.” From her womb I have witnessed Creation as the birth of our four children. I have encountered God in the people I have served with and served over my 42 years of year ministry: the Latinos who I have served and have served me, in the nursing homes and the hospitals, in the county jails, in the homeless, the sick and the dying with whom I have spent time with and led in prayer, and everywhere I have served.

The third relationship has been than special place within me, where God and I meet. Often those encounters are in the silence of meditative prayer. I remember encountering God in the sound of one chord from Copland’s Appalachian Spring that left me weeping with joy, and in the music I have directed and have composed.

There are multiple Epiphanies in our lives if only we possess the ability to be aware of them. God encounters us in many different ways throughout our daily living. We don’t have to be magi, nor do we have to be Moses or Elijah to have Epiphanies. God is in our lives daily. All we need to do is notice and to adore God.

This song is based on the following passage from Matthew’s Gospel:

In the time of King Herod, after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, asking, “Where is the child who has been born king of the Jews? For we observed his star at its rising, and have come to pay him homage.” … Then Herod secretly called for the wise men and learned from them the exact time when the star had appeared. Then he sent them to Bethlehem, saying, “Go and search diligently for the child; and when you have found him, bring me word so that I may also go and pay him homage.” When they had heard the king, they set out; and there, ahead of them, went the star that they had seen at its rising, until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw that the star had stopped, they were overwhelmed with joy. On entering the house, they saw the child with Mary his mother; and they knelt down and paid him homage. Then, opening their treasure chests, they offered him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they left for their own country by another road. (Matthew 2:1-2, 7-12. NRSV)

This Psalm Offering, with its march like melody, is a musical representation of the Magi journeying from faraway places to see the Messiah. Melody A is the Star they are following to lead them to the birthplace of the Messiah. The middle section, Melody B, is when they seek information from the Scribes and King Herod. Melody A returns to conclude in a majestic manner the Magi finally finding the stable and adoring the Christ Child.

I wrote this Psalm Offering as a Christmas present to Gwen Pearson. Gwen was the organist who accompanied the choir at St. Hubert. She, though Lutheran, was very generous with her time and her musical skills. She was a lovely woman, and a good musician. She used to love Central Lutheran Church in downtown Minneapolis and the organ concerts they use to present there. She loved the pipe organ and truly believed it to be the King of all instruments. A most faithful Lutheran who played more Catholic Masses than Lutheran services, may she rest in the eternal peace of God.

This song from the collection “Songs for the Refugee Christ at Christmas” is taken from Isaiah 62: 1-5 the first reading of the Vigil of Christmas.

For Zion’s sake I will not keep silent,
and for Jerusalem’s sake I will not rest,
until her vindication shines out like the dawn,
and her salvation like a burning torch.
The nations shall see your vindication,
and all the kings your glory;
and you shall be called by a new name
that the mouth of the Lord will give.
You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord,
and a royal diadem in the hand of your God.
You shall no more be termed Forsaken,
and your land shall no more be termed Desolate;
but you shall be called My Delight Is in Her,
and your land Married;
for the Lord delights in you,
and your land shall be married.
For as a young man marries a young woman,
so shall your builder marry you,
and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,so shall your God rejoice over you.

(Isaiah 62: 1-5, NRSV)

In composing this song, I wanted the melody to reflect the central theme of this text, namely, To Rejoice! God does not hold grudges for past transgressions. Though Israel abandoned God for other gods, God remained faithful to Israel. God always offers us an opportunity for reconciliation. While humanity tends to hold grudges, God does not hold grudges. Rather, God continues to open a door for us to a deeper relationship. We have to choose to walk past the threshold of that door into that deeper relationship. The ultimate gesture of love to us was the Incarnation of Jesus, the Word of God.

On this day in 2018, Ruthie’s mom, Rosemary moved from this life to the fullness of eternal life. Though she had been ailing for a while, her death was sudden and unexpected.

As in many households, Rosemary was the center of the family. Always welcoming, she was quick to sit down and visit over coffee, or even better, something that had a bit of a kick e.g. Irish Mist, apricot brandy, you get the picture. Relationships were a very high priority, and family was not narrowly defined by just blood relationships.

While keeping a neat house, she was not obsessive compulsive about it. I fondly remember her saying, “If you don’t like the way my house looks, take off your damn glasses.” A wonderful cook and baker, the kitchen was the heart of her home.

While God was the center of her life, she would not beat you over the head with a bible. She would speak her mind and that was that.

Similar to my maternal grandmother, her mother was Irish Catholic who married a Swede Lutheran (something that took a lot of moxie in those days). Though her maiden name was the Swedish Burg, the Irish McNeilly of her mother was definitely the dominant gene.

She definitely fit the description of the “good wife” from the book of Proverbs:

What is worth more than a strong and loving wife? She is more precious than jewels; Her husband’s heart trusts in her, from which no little gain is drawn. She brings good—not evil— to her house all the days of her life. For she seeks out tools of her trade, and works with willing hands. She is like the merchant ship which brings provisions from far off. She rises before dawn to put into motions the working of the household. After some consideration she buys a field and, with what she has earned, puts in a vineyard. She is up to the demands of labor, and her limbs rise to meet the task. She enjoys the success that comes with hard work, and her lamp burns late at night. She works the spindle in one hand, while holding the distaff in the other. She holds out a hand to the hungry, and opens her arms to the homeless. She prepares her household for snowy weather, for they are all warmly clothed. She makes her own quilts, and dresses in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected in the public square, and takes a seat among the elders. She makes linen garments for the market,
and delivers belts to the merchants. Strength and honor are her mien; she rejoices in the future. 26 Her speaking displays her wisdom;
words of kindness come from her tongue. She supervises the household well, and does not sit idle. Her children rise up and bless her; her husband, too, says, “thank you. Many women who have done very well, but you excel them all!” (Proverbs 31:10-29, The Inclusive Bible).

As in the parable of the stewards in Matthew’s Gospel, at the moment of her death, she heard Jesus say, “‘Well done! You are a good and faithful worker. Since you were dependable in a small matter, I will put you in charge of larger affairs. Come, share my joy!”

Shortly after her death, I composed the piano song in her memory. Rest well, Rosemary. May we rejoice together sometime in the future.

This song is based on a motet I composed as a Christmas present for my parents in 1990. This is the text I had written for the motet.

Most wondrous mystery, Word of God Incarnate,
In your humanity, you raise us up to heaven.
Sweet sacrifice of our redemption,
within your infant form
lay the source of our creation.

Most wondrous act of love
from the heart of God’s great love,
in your small hands contain
freedom from our sin and pain.
Sweet child nestled on your mother’s breast,
within your heart so small
dwells our source of all hope, peace, and rest.

(c) 1990, Robert Charles Wagner. All rights reserved.

In the text, I attempted to express the divine paradox we hear expressed in the Prologue of John’s Gospel. The One through whom all life was created, and through whom salvation would come to our world, is at the same time One who embodies the most vulnerable and most weak form of humanity, that of an infant.

Of all the human revolutions that have rocked and changed our world, the greatest revolution that utterly changed our world was that of Jesus’. He tipped our world on its axis, and used love, not weapons, to effect the change in our world.

The song is in a musical form called “Variations on a Theme.” In the world of piano music, some of the most famous of variations on a theme are Beethoven’s Eroica Variations (based on a theme from his “Eroica” Symphony #3), and Felix Mendelssohn’s “17 Variations On A Theme”, which I played in my graduation recital.

I use the motet as my theme, and what follows are six variations on that theme ending with a recapitulation of the theme. Just as an anecdote, I composed the majority of this piece at the kitchen table on Halloween of 2018. I kept on getting interrupted by tricker treaters at the door. I would compose a variation or a bit of a variation, run to give candy at the door, sit down, compose a few more measures, get up and give candy at the door over a period of 2 1/2 hours. I was relieved to when I shut off the light outdoor and closed the door. I finished the song somewhere around midnight of All Saints Day. I number it as one of the best piano songs I have composed in my life.

In 42 years of church ministry, I discovered that many people die just prior to, on, and just after the Solemnity of Christmas. It was not at all unusual to preside at wake prayers on Christmas Day and have the funeral the day after Christmas. One year, I was personally involved in six funerals during the octave of Christmas.

How can this happen at Christmas?

Simply, death doesn’t take a holiday for anyone.

I have found that for those who are terminally ill, some often make it a point to reach a goal before dying e.g. an anniversary or a holiday. I remember a pastoral visit to a patient in the local hospital shortly after Labor Day. I knocked on the door and asked the woman if it were a good time to visit, and she answered it was okay. When I asked her how things were going, her reply was short and to the point, “Horseshit!” I asked her what was going on. She explained that her oncologist had just told her that her cancer was terminal and that she would not live to see the holidays. I asked her what holidays she wanted to make. She replied, “Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and Easter.” Through sheer will power she made each and every one of those holidays. When she got to Easter, she said that she was ready to let go, and died soon after.

Why do so many of our loved ones die in, on, or shortly after Christmas?In the end, I don’t know, but they do. In our world in which we want answers for everything, our lives and our deaths are encompassed by Mystery.

Within many of the more ancient Christmas carols, death is very much present. As one theologian once pointed out in a graduate school class in my past, Jesus was born so that he could die for us. At the time, I thought, “Dang, that must have sucked for Jesus.” But the theologian was spot on. Jesus was born so that he could die out of love for us, and in dying rise again from the dead so that we all may eternal life. In the familiar carol of the Holly and the Ivy, see how the death of Jesus is prefigured in the lyric.

The holly and the ivy,
When they are both full grown,
Of all the trees that are in the wood,
The holly bears the crown.
The rising of the sun,
And the running of the deer,
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.

The holly bears a berry,
As sweet as any flower,
And Mary bore sweet Jesus Christ,
To be our sweet savior.
The rising of the sun,
And the running of the deer,
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.

The holly bears a berry,
As red as any blood,
And Mary bore sweet Jesus Christ,
For to do us sinners good.
The rising of the sun,
And the running of the deer,
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.

The holly bears a prickle,
As sharp as any thorn,
And Mary bore sweet Jesus Christ,
On Christmas day in the morn’.
The rising of the sun,
And the running of the deer,
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.

The holly bears a bark,
As bitter as any gall,
And Mary bore sweet Jesus Christ,
For to redeem us all.
The rising of the sun,
And the running of the deer,
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.
The playing of the merry organ,
Sweet singing in the choir.

My all time favorite Christmas carol, “Tomorrow Shall Be My Dancing Day,” is pretty blunt about this.

1. Tomorrow shall be my dancing day;
I would my true love did so chance
To see the legend of my play,
To call my true love to my dance;

Chorus
Sing, oh! my love, oh! my love, my love, my love,
This have I done for my true love¹

2. Then was I born of a virgin pure,²
Of her I took fleshly substance
Thus was I knit to man’s nature
To call my true love to my dance. Chorus

3. In a manger laid, and wrapped I was
So very poor, this was my chance
Betwixt an ox and a silly poor ass
To call my true love to my dance. Chorus

4. Then afterwards baptized I was;
The Holy Ghost on me did glance,
My Father’s voice heard from above,
To call my true love to my dance. Chorus

5. Into the desert I was led,
Where I fasted without substance;
The Devil bade me make stones my bread,
To have me break my true love’s dance. Chorus

6. The Jews on me they made great suit,
And with me made great variance,
Because they loved darkness rather than light,
To call my true love to my dance. Chorus

7. For thirty pence Judas me sold,
His covetousness for to advance:
Mark whom I kiss, the same do hold!
The same is he shall lead the dance. Chorus

8. Before Pilate the Jews me brought,
Where Barabbas had deliverance;
They scourged me and set me at nought,
Judged me to die to lead the dance. Chorus

9. Then on the cross hanged I was,
Where a spear my heart did glance;
There issued forth both water and blood,
To call my true love to my dance. Chorus

10. Then down to hell I took my way
For my true love’s deliverance,
And rose again on the third day,
Up to my true love and the dance. Chorus

11. Then up to heaven I did ascend,
Where now I dwell in sure substance
On the right hand of God, that man
May come unto the general dance. Chorus

NOTE: By the Jews, the carol does not target all Jews, but rather, as in John’s Gospel, “The Jews” means the Jewish religious authorities.

Paul writes in his letter to the Romans, these words:

Are you unaware that we who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were indeed buried with him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life. (Romans 6:3-4, New American Bible)

I doubt that many parents think of this as their infant is being baptized. I know that it never occurred to me at the baptism of my children. In baptizing our infants, we are baptizing them into the death of Jesus. What a thought at the beginning of human life. But that is what we are doing.

As we mourn our loved ones who die during this time of Christmas, the comfort we can take from their deaths is that in their dying they have born to new life everlasting. As was stated in the obituary of my good friend, Deacon Frank Asenbrenner who died on December 31st, “[He was] preceded in death and now reunited in the Kingdom of Heaven with Margaret, his loving wife of 52 years.”

Here are some of my friends and loved ones who have died during the Christmas season.

Returning one more time to the shepherds, today.

In the Lucan account of the Nativity of Jesus, we read, ” The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them.” (Luke 2:20, NRSV)

In my mind’s eye as the shepherds returned, they just didn’t merely walked, they danced. This song was a Christmas present for my grandchildren in 2017.